Are you putting yourself out there?

Why is it that no matter the life problem, the solution offered is, "Well, are you putting yourself out there?"

Are you unemployed or dissatisfied with not being able to find a fulfilling job? Well, are you putting yourself out there?

Are you 'single' (set that terminology aside for further blog dissection)? Well, are you putting yourself out there?

Move to a new city and looking for community (or in the same place and wanting some new stimuli)? Well, are you putting yourself out there?

What does this mean? Putting yourself out there? Are we simply knick-knacks to be put on display? And exactly where and how are we supposed to be displaying ourselves? Or, is this just another cliche, like 'give it time?' (Though, actually, that is usually true advice, just never comforting when in a situation where someone would tell you that).

I love my life right now, but I also am always evolving. Evolution (of the personal sort) breeds a certain expression of discontent. If I at all hint at the slightest discontent, it elicits this idea that I am not putting myself out there. I am far from a socialite by any definition, but I also, like most of my friends, am not a hermit. I am happy, but not complacent (do I want to be?).

My friends in NY who are looking for jobs, faxing resumes as their full-time 'unemployment,' are definitely putting themselves (or paper representations of themselves) out there. They go to networking events, which, I presume, are out there somewhere. Or is it more about sitting around cafes and riding the subways hoping for that moment of synchronicity where you will run into that CEO who is looking for someone with your exact skills.

JLa is putting himself out there: finishing med school, moving to Brazil to celebrate Carnivale and his transition to a new city, to the beginning of life (or lack of) in residency in emergency medicine.

Alizarin is putting herself out there writing and meeting other writers via livejournal despite the taxing schedule of working the night shift.

Grooveva puts herself out there via her artwork (which I think she does for free much too often still), her friendships, her photography, her writing.

I think we need a new solution. Or, as I told P today, as she grilled me about my job satisfaction and my extracurricular activities, there really is nothing in my life that needs to be fixed. I am out there. I am enjoying life. I relish the luxury to procrastinate work by silly writings like this. I am thankful that I still am driven to challenge myself to live more fully (does procrastination fit into this, since it really is a luxury?).

As frivolous as my daily habits may seem to others, I refuse to put- myself -out -there in some attempt to find something I am not so sure I am missing. Instead, I will authentically stay in or go out as I please, and at some point, I may get there.