Pure Intentions

Intentions. What we mean to do. How we hope to behave. What we
want others and ourselves to believe.

Not goals to be met. Not wishes to be granted. Not hopes in the
face of the impossible.

Intentions. Promises to ourselves.

And even when our intentions are 'good,' are they ever truly pure?
Is there ever a point when our intentions can be completely free of
expectations, of hopes and wishes?

I spent my Friday evening meditating with a group of strangers, each
of us simultaneously working to harness and refocus the energy that
each breath brings into our beings. Points of resistance followed by
a surrender to fears and anger and unforgiveness. At the end of the
evening we cast our intentions into a bowl, offering up to God and
the universe what we hope is our best and our best guess as to the
places we need to improve ourselves to improve our world. A
contract, a bond.

My intentions, painfully worded for clarity and honesty and good
will, in practice, my are exposed as wishes, hopes, and desires, not
intentions. In my intentions, I see that I am not completely ready
to let go of what I want, that my intention which I thought was about
letting go and letting be was about trying to recapture something I
fear I lost, something I love and cherish and do not know how to live
with or without.

Intentions are attempts at rising above our weaknesses and what we
think we know is best.